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I am riding on this cart. The track is similar to autotopia at Disneyland, except we are going through a building. There is a guy in front of me who keeps blocking me at every turn. I am getting annoyed since I want to enjoy the ride and he just wants to get in my way. I find an apportunity to pass him. I take it and go up into this room. The guy tries to block me then follows my up into the room on a parallel track. As we get into the room his cart falls onto its side and traps him. I get off of my cart as well as Charles who I did not realize is on my cart as well. We unwrap this wooden box and the leave. The other guy starts screaming for help. We do not help him we sacrifice him to the snake that is in the box.

Years later I come back to this building to capture this snake. It has gotten very large and according to the platoon that is with me, it is not too dangerous to be free even if it has never left this building. We all hide in this large cubboard, which on the inside looks like a sun room. We close all the blinds to keep it dark. There are cats on the ledges on these windows and are not pleased that we are trying to take their spots.

We all move into a kitchen where others are and make some sort of meal, mainly sandwiches. Suddenly I see that under this large round table is the snake coiled up. It is huge. It completely fills up the whole underpart of the table. I only see part of it snake because of the covering over the table.

We all vacate the room and back in the cubboard, the back wall completely opens up and we all walk out of the building. The ground is wet since we are near a marsh and beyond that an ocean. Everyone else is wearing combat boots but I am wearing slippers. I am worried about having soaked feet but I, then, notice another person in slippers and they do not seem to worry about getting wet. I step off the plank that was the wall and head out of the building like so many other people. There is a whole army stationed outside this building. All there to capture this snake.

Part of me feels like I am in a movie and one that I have seen where Tom Hanks is the hero and does end up capturing and defeating this snake but not in the building but on the beach below.

A platoon tries to go back in with some sort of chemical that has to be administered exactly on its head at a certain time in order to work. They go in, I know it won't be successful. I head towards the beach and walk along a path that is parallel to the ocean. I start to walk along it.

Next time I come near the building it is years later and has become a temple in which the snake lives. There are shops around and at one point they added a stone wall and put a robotic lion which had a large hole at the hip joint and it was circled in red. It was being worshiped as the deity of the temple and the people made a female mate for the lion. The female went into the temple and the male stayed on the outside showing the people around how it was mating with the female. Suddenly the male lion was being attacked by an unseen force which is concluded that the snake is the one attacking it. People start to run.

I realize I have to get out of this place and go to the ferry building and try and get on the boat about to leave. I skip through the line but see that those being being processed, having their papers checked, are being drugged and being taken off the boat back to the temple.

The backstory starts to play as I see some of the snake skin being used to drug these folks. I pick some up and cradle it. I made this snake. It is my baby. I picked parts of it out the ground as well as off of some rock paintings and made this snake.

I realize the snake wants me but I do not want to be drugged to see it. I jump off the deck with some other people and strap myself down onto a hovercraft. It was useless to escape since we were riding straight into 20 ft waves that surrounded this now island. We end up being pulled back and I start to fly away. Men in suits come after me. They tell me the snake wants me but I refuse to go because these men will try and drug me before hand. I want to go on my own terms.

End of dream


[reposted post] Rape Prevention Tips

by Leigh Hofheimer under Prevention

Ten rape prevention tips:

1. Don’t put drugs in women’s drinks.

2. When you see a woman walking by herself, leave her alone.

3. If you pull over to help a woman whose car has broken down, remember not to rape her.

4. If you are in an elevator and a woman gets in, don’t rape her.

5. When you encounter a woman who is asleep, the safest course of action is to not rape her.

6. Never creep into a woman’s home through an unlocked door or window, or spring out at her from between parked cars, or rape her.

7. Remember, people go to the laundry room to do their laundry. Do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.

8. Use the Buddy System! If it is inconvenient for you to stop yourself from raping women, ask a trusted friend to accompany you at all times.

9. Carry a rape whistle. If you find that you are about to rape someone, blow the whistle until someone comes to stop you.

10. Don’t forget: Honesty is the best policy. When asking a woman out on a date, don’t pretend that you are interested in her as a person; tell her straight up that you expect to be raping her later. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the woman may take it as a sign that you do not plan to rape her.

Pomba Gira/ PantheaCon

I love Pomba Gira, I love dancing away with a whole lot of other pagans. Right now I am feeling sad I cannot enjoy the whole experience.

Being an introvert as well as an empath, it takes a lot of trust to be able to open myself up completely. Since I do not know most of the people in the room, there was no way I was going to do that. So this just becomes a place to dance, like the Saturday night drum jamb. I freaked out at the thought of my friends not getting in and having to dance by myself, I am glad they got in but sometimes being the 5th wheel can be tiring.

Also I cannot do meaningless sex, sometimes I wish I could. I am sure it would do me some good do to be able to have some sustained human contact, but I need to know a person as well as able to trust someone to become intimate with them. Plus nature made sure that I could not do that this weekend if I had decided to say screw it. I am clean and healthy and I plan to stay that way, I am not sure guys would be honest with me about any STD's if they thought they could get lucky. Also I could still see I am attracted to those who act like assholes so it is good that I stay single. I don't need to add those people into my life.

And Ladies, just because I did not show any interest at the guy who came and danced in my little circle of friends does not mean I am bat with a different team so don't start bumping into me to get my attention.

Maybe one day I can open up and get the full effect but until then I will go and enjoy what I can from the experience.


This happened between 4:30 and 7:30 this morning

I have been walking through a market, much like the ones they have in Europe, where it is a big area with lots of permanent booths owned but different folks selling stuff.

I finally get out of the market, I don't buy anything and I head over a bridge to a tree lined street/path. It is becoming dark. I come across a stuck car, small SUV. In my dream it is my father's car. A man who I am assuming is my father is sitting outside the car in a beach chair yelling insults because he is stuck, he is stuck on Fae land.

As I walk off the road and around the car to see him, I feel two nails coming out of my right foot. I pull them out of the the top of my shoe one by one, by the sharp end.

Each nail changes into a rather large sealed terrarium type object, the terrarium is also in a clear draw string bad. I look into each of them to see what is in them. In my mind I know they are curses.

The first one is a potion but it is converting back into its individual ingredients, one I recognize as hemlock.

The other is piece of hemp rope that is completely unravelled.

I start to walk away with these bags in my hand, in my mind I am told I have to take these nails and nail them into Fae land to destroy the curse. I turn back around and find the car gone and possibly the Fae land as well. It is light outside again.


Wild Dreams

Weird Wild dreams last night. It has been a while since I have remembered 3 dreams in one night.

First dream I was cleaning soap scum off of toilets, liberally spraying them will cleaning product and letting them soak. The dream morphed into me being in my childhood bedroom and being in bed with Nathan Fillion.

Second Dream I was at my job but I was at my job in the 1970's, where personal computers did not exist. I found my desk and it had a typewriter on it. I know how to use one, that is what I learned how to type with but a coworker kept trying to "show" me how to use it. I kept telling him that the paper was in crooked and he solution was to take it completely apart instead of adjusting the paper. I also met another coworker and his wife. His wife was telling me that the guy was concerned about how he will be in 30 years time. I told her that he was going to be just fine.

The third dream I was by some water. A bunch of people were celebrating the return of the water. (which is fitting since we got our first rains yesterday). The rivers were filling, but the water came from trucks but the truck were able to hold enough water to provide enough to fill large deep rivers. But suddenly the water started draining quickly and the ground/sand around the river started shifting. Reading Dune helped me realize what was happening. I rolled out of the dried river bed, and started moving away from the edge. Everyone was standing at the edge wondering what happened to the water, I was on my back and I was trying to decide if I should keep my eyes closed or not since I knew what was coming. I forced my eyes to stay open, being scared was not going to help the situation. Suddenly the worm came out of the sand and went way up into the sky. Everyone scattered and I turned over and ran as fast as I could to the rocky areas. I hoped that the worm would head to the other direction. As I got to the rocky area a head did appear out of the sand but it was a giant human head. I just remember the eyes were yellow. I ran around it and walked through the rocky formations.


The universe works in mysterious ways

The other day I saw 3 deer run through my yard, a buck, a doe and a young one. I felt sad since they were obviously scared about something that caused them to race through.

I said out loud to myself that I did not like the fact they were scared and I have always hoped that deer and turkeys would feel safe and want to hang out in my yard.

Well part of yesterday and all of today the buck and doe have been hanging out in my yard, feeding and resting. They got a little skittish when I went out on my deck to hang out and take in my laundry but they have stayed. This brings me much joy.


I am in a high school gym. There is a rally going on for the football team. Here football is golden. The team has been champions for years.
The coach's son is in the section next to the team section. He is not an athlete. He is dressed like a loner. He has friends but they are all loners as well.
The coach/father calls his son down to him. It is the son's birthday and he is making the football team sing happy birthday to him. The team does it with gusto because the coach told them to do it. The son walks off thoroughly embarrassed afterwards. The coach pulls his favorite player aside to talk to him,then sends him off and the other players to practice.
The coach then goes to an enclosed box/cart. I look inside. He has miniature fruit trees growing inside. His hobby is making fruit pasteries and will only use fruits he grows. He is a protectionist that way.
Next the favorite player is sitting on a beach with his feet almost touching the water. He is being interviewed for a sports article. Suddenly he lunges forward and starts throwing up in the water. He is throwing up the miniature fruit that I was earlier. I am guessing that the coach has poisoned him for not singing propery for his son.
He goes farther into the water and off screen to me. The reporter is running away. Either afraid of what the coach did or he is getting help.
The water starts to glow gold. The football player comes out glowing gold. I look at his face and his eyes are golden fire. He has come back reborn into something.
Another man comes up to him. At this time I take off flying to warn someone. I go up high enough so the other man can it see me, but to the golden man, he can see very far and I am like tinkerbell. I am glowing with pixie dust and he sees me like a golden star. The other man knows I have seen what happened and wants me stopped from telling anyone.
I fly as fast as I can to high rise. I am at the door and with tinkerbell trying to remember the number of the person we have to warn. Eventually we get through but end up at the house I grew up in.
I start closing all the windows and doors and locking them.when I get to the front door I see the football player. He is no longer glowing gold. He is looking normal. I recognize him though and I hear the voice of the other man talking through the neighbors intercom trying to find me.
I lock three doors which comprise of my front door. There are two lock on each door. I see the football player walking intop the fence that separates this house and the neighbor's.
Suddenly the front door opens. The man just walks in, I realize how stupid it was to lock it. He easily opened it with just his mind. I sit down in the chair in the corner across from the door.
As the man walks in the football player sulks at the threshold. The man wants to know what I saw and wants to remove the memory. He wants to keep it secret only to himself and the football player. He wants to see what I know.
I let him look into my mind. He closes his eyes and his real eyes open up to do just that.
Next thing I know I am flying in a plane with the two of them. They are looking for a hideout. I secretly hope the man did not go too deep into my mind and find out where the Island of the Amazons is. The football player wants to have an island where the sun comes up from the east.
Next thing I know I am with friends and I am holding a small metal object with a star imprinted onto it with a number in the middle. The friends want to know what it is about or if I remember getting it. I tell them "No, but I feel calmer now than before".


Jul. 7th, 2012

Just woke up from a horrible dream. In the dream I was told one of my old bosses had died. I hope it is nOt true.

I hate crying in my dreams.
I have a headache. I went to bed early to get rid of it. It did not work. I am very tense, tight.

I am in the dining room of the house in el cerrito. The table is covered in food and the Sunday paper. People are talking and eating and reading the paper. All the food is gone by the time I get there and the paper is all read. I am talking to Carlos to see if he is going to the dream circle. He says yes.

I find the comics at the bottom of the pile. I grab it and head over to the heater and start to read. There is a guy there and he looks at the paper in my had funny. I see I have grabbed the world sports section. I could have sworn it was the comics when I picked it up. I close it and look at him and asks if he wants it. He takes it and I search for the comics again. I find it but once again when I look inside there are no comics.

I give up and the group starts talking about playing tennis. I head to the living room and run into a few more people. I tell them we are going to play tennis. They ask if the courts are still there. I tell them they better be since we had just resurfaced them before the whole redo of the school, it would be stupid to completely replace them. The guy in the corner mentions something about saying they better be worth it with all the money spent by tax payers. I said that they were and head out the door.

I drive down a street and park my car and head to these courts. I notice there are these huge houses and see that one house has a smaller house on the lot. As I pay closer attention to the smaller houses i see they are doll houses not livable, which disappoints me because I thought it would be cool to either live in the smaller place of have the lot of houses as a family compound. There is a small dollhouse in the front too. I look at the big house and see someone riding on a swing set horse inside. I scoff and think they are all just big dollhouses.

I turn and walk back towards the street where my car is and I come across a red front facade of a house. I realize it has the same grand front facade but the rest of the house is under a hill. I am excited and tell the person next to me that I want to go inside because it is an underground house. We walk inside. It is one huge vast dome. I tell the person with me that I could live here. I am smiling as I look around. There arecaclit of people walking around. It looks like a shopping center, but it is an open house. I walk past a large grand staircase on the back right side of the house. Two gifts want to see what is on the top floors, they start climbing up the outside railings to get to the top. I decide I want to beat them up there but I will take the stairs. The stairs are beautiful marble. The first step is way off the ground but it is doable. I comment to myself wondering why the builder made such a bad error. The stairs stay marble as I continue up the different floors. I end up crawling up over an open aquarium at the top of one floor which ends ups going to some carpeted floor. I see a person from the back with long hair and a white robe vacuuming. I head towards the person saying "hello" but start backtracking once I start noticing the rooms and walls start looking like cages. The person turns around and their eyes are glowing and she starts to grab for me. I run toward the stairs and try to crawl over the aquarium so I don't fall in and notice the room becomes full of cages and the people who visited before me and all forced into these paper pushing, real estate jobs to get more people into the house. I some how start a rebellion and they start leaving their cages and we all start moving higher and higher up the stairs until we get to the top. It is open to the outside there and people are waiting for a prophecy to come true about a man coming out of the volcanic mud. Minnow knew of the prophecy. I look into the mud and start to see a face form, staring with the eyes. Then a head came out and the. The rest of the body. He has us start climbing over this vine like structure to get completely out. I start thinking about the dream circle again and wonder how Carlos would get there since it will be in Carmel, I am thinking that his girlfriend will bring him down since she has done it before. I considering driving him back since it would be a long drive to pick him back up again.

I am heading back to my car again, but end up following this couple to a harbor next to the street where my car is parked. I find my boat. It is a fishing boat but it is a car inside. I pull the boat closer to me so I can get inside to drive it. I go in through the passenger side. I put the key in and put it in reverse and the once I am out I out it in drive an drive off. I come to a fork in the stream and chose the one on the left that goes down and has more curves. It looks more fun. When I get to the bottom they boat disappears and I am jumping over railroad tracks to get to a village. A family watches me jump over the tracks and asks it I can jump over all of them. I say yes. They ask if I can take their daughter I say sure. I look up a hill to my right and notice a large statue of a God come slowly down the hill. All the women start running into the village. I take the girls hand and run as well. At one point I turn around to see if he is coming and the color changes, it gets darker and I hear a voice saying someone's name and that that person should come to them because they love them. I turn around and start trying to find a place to hide the girl. As I turn around it becomes lighter again.

We finally run into a bakery shop. The bottom floor is where the bakery is and the women beckon me in there since there is a party going on and it will be fun. I take the girl with me upstairs. There is a maternity shop on the next floor but we just pass through and head up higher and to me hopefully to the center of the house. At one point I stop and hide her under a window seat and wait to see if this statue walks by. It doesn't it stops and starts to turn around to look into the window. We are just above eye level to the statue. I grab her arm and start going through doors.

I notice the rooms become one color, either white, grey or a grey ish blue as I walk through them. The rooms all look like they have some nest in the center that I walk around to get to the next door.


List in the ten Faire dream

I am going to the Ren Faire. I have been driving for most of the day. I am showing up late. It is almost at the end of the day. I still see I have time to visit one shop where I can buy some cool outfits and say "hi" to a friend at the same time.

I first park way out of the way in a corner, behind a grocery store and start walking to where I believe is the gate to buy tickets. There is a gate that looks like a back door in but I am uncomfortable about it. A lot of people are sneaking in and running down the path. I continue walking towards the "right" gate. I come across a woman in Ren clothes, her back it toward me. She greets me and I stop and make a comment on whether I should go to the right gate or sneaking into the one that is free. She looks at me strange. I continue walking even though I see it is a far way to go.

The dream shifts. I am in the car again. I am with my sister. I am taking her to get an outfit at the Ren Faire. I am driving and we stop at a 4 way stop. We are driving on a paved road but the perpendicular road is a dirt road. I see my Ren Faire/ high school friend put something down on the corner on my right side. I tell my sister it is her and we get out of the car. She is putting down the bundle she is taking home since the Faire is almost over for the day. She is wearing here Ren Faire best with a shawl over her. She is very happy to see both of us and hug us both. She tells us to come to the shop she works at and I tell her we are planning to go straight to her. I ask since we only have 30 min till the end, if there is time, she says there is plenty of time.

She tells us to follow her and takes off. We start but wonder what to do with the car. I say my ex husband can take care of it. He gets all pissy and ends up pulling out the net that is under the driver seat and says how the fuck am I supposed to drive this. It is a big black net that looks like something to help a handicapped person into a bed or bath. He is in the net and starts moving round and an round in it. I berate him and grab the control and push one button and the net goes straight back under the seat. I berate him about how easy that was to fix. I then grab my sisters hand and start running after my friend. My sis asks if there will be enough to time and I say yes.

I start picturing my sister getting great treatment in picking out an outfit and I try to think about what I want to get. I think about the expense and try to convince myself it is okay and my ex spends much more so I deserve to treat myself once in a while.

We pay for our tickets and end up going through this convoluted area of house wears and nothing even close to Ren Faire stuff. I know I have to get through all of this to get to the actual Ren Faire booths. We run into my ex and he is carrying all these cheap knock off rattles and small drums. I huff and walk around him, I don't want to talk to him. We have a half an hour and need to be at that shop.

I see a switch back stair way and instead of using the stairway I climb up the gates and help my sister up too and we climb up to the top, sneaking our way so no one sees us trying to move up the line quickly. Once we get to the top a family with two small children barrel into us, I grab one of the kids to keep them from falling down the stairs so they do not get hurt. The family says sorry and we move on. I finally see a small sign to get to the shop. We just have to go down one narrow pathway and we are there. We still have 30 min till it ends.

We keep going down and down and down and I cannot see the booth. I know my friend is waiting for us and we are hurrying to get there but we can't seem to get to it. After more and more running I see we are on a paved road in a city and realize we are lost. I tell my sister that I am sorry and we most have missed a turn somewhere and I did not see the sign.

We cross the street and head down another street. We are watching for cars as we cross but almost get hit by one going up the wrong side of the road.

We end up on dirt road again and see a Ren Faire guy jogging so I believe we are going the right way again. I look at my sister's watch and see we still have 30 minutes. We debate on why we they need to close down so early, the sun does not set that early. They could easily close at 6 instead of 5.

Suddenly my sister becomes a guy who wants to go down back where we came because they want a drink and get drunk. I say okay. I then get berated about how I should have said no since he did not want the get drunk and how it was not good for him. We see a few people going up the hill and turn around again and walk up it.

I wake up.